Miscarriage (or the loss of a child in utero or stillborn) is a topic of conversation that is often avoided in today’s society. However, miscarriages in particular happen rather frequently. Studies note that anywhere from 10-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies will end in a miscarriage (www.americanpregnancy.org).
In 2003, after three years of marriage, we decided it was time to “try” and start a family. In late 2003, we were thrilled to find out Wendi was pregnant. A few weeks later, we suffered a devastating miscarriage.
When we told family and friends what we were going through, we were shocked to find out how many other people we knew had gone through this very same trial; some on multiple occasions. Why had we never heard anybody discuss their loss before? We wondered why this topic was so “taboo” in our society, both in secular and religious settings.
Where were the support groups? Why wasn’t the topic addressed in church? Why did we feel so alone? How could we heal the hurt?
Sadly, many in our spheres of influence did not know how to help us. Some may have thought they were helping by offering cliché words of “encouragement”; words that often hurt more than the speaker would ever know.
During this time, we dealt with the pressures of the medical process, the pain of our loss and simply trying to keep our focus and faith.
We learned a lot about life, faith and each other!
Resources on Miscarriage
A Place to Remember – www.aplacetoremember.com
Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep – www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org
Silent Grief – www.silentgrief.com
Focus on the Family www.focusonthefamily.com/lifechallenges